Adios Señor Equis

I recently found a few things out about Mr.X that kind of change my perception of him. No longer someone I really have a desire to date (if that chance even arose). Kind of disappointing. He's still fine as a friend but I know it's going to be hard for me to switch to friend mode without acting like a bitch to him. I figure I have to change the way I act around him. I just don't want a drop in contact to seem like I am mad at him or something. Kind of goes back to the Tears of a Clown thing I posted about the other week. I have to act like everything is hunky-dorey because I did not learn this info directly from him. ¡Que chingados!

So, anyone know any single guys, 25-35 years old, over 5'10" tall????

Doctor's Visit

Today I took Mandy to the vet for her shots. My poor Little Girl. The vet tech comes in to weigh Mandy and get her temp. What does Mandy do? She hisses and tries to bite the nice girl. She tried coaxing Mandy onto the scale, who wouldn't even go for a cat treat. I had to pick Mandy up and hold my arms around the scale like a little bubble to keep Mandy on the scale. I finally realized how tiny Mandy really is. She only weighs 6lbs. 9oz.!!! As we wait for the doctor, Mandy checks out the exam room. I think she was looking for an escape route! Of course the vet is a man and you know her track record with men. At one point the vet even takes a step away from the counter so Mandy can't take a swipe at him. I am completely embarrassed by this! Why is my loving kitty so mean to other people??? He even takes Mandy to the back in her cat carrier!

Mandy is getting boarded next week while I am in Seattle, and so I decided to get her spayed during that time (yes, I know. I have procrastinated on this one!). That meant she also had to have blood drawn too so they could do pre-op blood work. And I had them trim her "Howard Hughes" claws. I'm such a mean mom, huh? So she was pretty exhausted after all the poking and prodding she got. We got home around 12:30pm and she has done nothing except sleep on my bed for the last 8 hours. I feel a little sorry for her. I'd feel even more sorry for her if I wasn't spending over $500 on her for all of this!!!

Stayin' Alive Against Team 5!

Last night was our third week of bowling and as usual it was a fun night!! We bowled against Team 5. They were apparently too lazy to name their team. There are just two bowlers actually and two vacant spots. The vacant spots are a minor source of ire for me because these two "bowlers" score 150s across the board. Que chingados?! I thought vacant spots were given 100 as a score. 150 is a little generous. So of course Team 5 is ahead of us in the standings. Well, so are 8 other teams, but who's counting? Anyway, the two real bowlers didn't even show up!

We started the night with our usual pitcher of beer and order of chilli cheese fries and chicken bites. The weird thing was all the sausces came on the side. Still tasted good though! We bowled near "Al Pacino" again so that was fun. Not too much to say about this week except we actually won all but one game!! I bowled a 136, 148, and a 153. My goal this summer is to beat my personal best of 180. I think I can do it!

Movin' To Brazil!!

Just now we decided that should the US go to war with North Korea, we will move to Brazil. Dallas had suggested Canada, but Jake (who apparently has put some thought into this) suggested Brazil because of their reluctance to extradite. This is so Jake and Dallas don't have to go to war.

Jake sealed the deal for the move by saying we could have mojitos. I said we could rumba. From there we decided that we are opening a bar. I will be the hostess. Dallas is the bartender. Jake is the bouncer. Clarice is the eye-candy waitress. Freddy is the old dude who sits at the corner of the bar, wearing a Panama hat and drinking whiskey we import especially for him. Carol runs the bed and breakfast next to the bar with help from Rosie. Ron is our dance instructor. Marc is our DJ. Justin provides our intel. Malachi will become Brazil's next soccer super star. He will be known simply as Chi (since Brazilians tend to go by one name only). Caitlin will become Brazil's gymnastic superstar. Dallas' mom will be the bar manager. Perry is the cook.

And if the bar thing doesn't work out, we can always get some land in the Amazon and grow a certain cash crop!!

Música en otro idioma

When I was younger I always wondered how people like Michael Jackson and Madonna could have fans in countries that didn't speak English. How did they know the words to the songs? In the "few" years since then I have realized it is all memorization. I think the first song I learned in a foreign language was "Frère Jacques" when I was preschool or kindergarten. But I don't think it was until Ricky Martin and Enrique Iglesias became popular awhile back that I liked a song in another language without knowing its meaning. I bought Ricky Martin's Spanish language album and can sing along to a couple of the songs. I have no idea what I'm saying though except for a word here or there. I tried this weekend to learn some of the lyrics to a few Pitbull and Daddy Yankee songs, but that is muy difícil!! I can follow the more lyrical parts of the song but once they start rapping, I am lost!! I have no desire to have the lyrics translated into English though. I think I can pretty much guarantee that they are dirty!!

Happy Anniversary???

My parent's 40th anniversary is tomorrow so I thought I would send them a nice bouquet of flowers for the event. On Monday I ordered th bouquet pictured above and had it scheduled to be delivered on the 19th. It never showed yesterday. So I get a text from my mom today around 2pm saying they still haven't received the flowers. I call 1-800-FLOWERS and after navigating through the damn voice-activated system, I finally get to an operator. They tell me the order was sent to the local florist but never got printed out. The florist has no idea the order even exists. Apparently, this is a "glitch" in the system that happens when you order online. The operator was going to contact the florist and see if the flowers could be delivered Sunday morning. If? IF? FUCK THAT SHIT! So I cancelled the order. Even though I got my money back, I am still pissed. At least I sent a card.

Things That Go Bump In The Night - Part II

About six months ago, I came home to find the faucet in my backyard running. The pipe had burst or anything. Someone actually turned on the water and left it running. It was that night that I freaked out and thought I was going to be killed. Last night I thought someone was trying to break into the house.

I woke up around 3:30am to Mandy practically throwing herself at her favorite window perch by my bed. She normally sits on the sill and tries to play with the blinds. I wasn't going to take any of her crap at 3:30am so I locked her out of the bedroom. Not even 5 minutes later, I hear her growling. I open the bedroom door and that is when I start to hear something on the patio. It sounded like someone trying to open the sliding glass door to my bedroom. My heart started pounding fast. I grabbed my phone. Who was I gonna call? 911? Mr.X? Ghostbusters? I thought if I was going to call 911, I should at least confirm someone is trying to break in. My gameplan: confirm intruder, call 911, run out of house through garage, go to neighbor's house, call Mr. X (no way I'd go back into my house alone!), and wait until the police showed up. I'd wait until next time to call the Ghostbusters.

So I go over to the sliding glass door in the living room where Mandy is growling. I carefully move one of the blinds so I can take a peek. At this point I think I am crazy for doing this since I am completely unarmed. I look outside and to my great relief the only thing out there is a ginormous stray cat! It left after a few attempts to scare it away. Then I picked up Mandy, gave her a big hug for alerting me (even though it was just a cat and not an intruder),told her I wouldn't have her declawed (her reward), and let her back into the bedroom. I realized that she lept to the window because she saw the cat enter our yard. I wonder if she would do that if she saw a person come into the yard at night?

Unlike last time, at least I now have phone numbers for people I can call in the wee hours of the morning when I get scared! But I was fine once I saw that it was just a cat. Phew.