Just now we decided that should the US go to war with North Korea, we will move to Brazil. Dallas had suggested Canada, but Jake (who apparently has put some thought into this) suggested Brazil because of their reluctance to extradite. This is so Jake and Dallas don't have to go to war.
Jake sealed the deal for the move by saying we could have mojitos. I said we could rumba. From there we decided that we are opening a bar. I will be the hostess. Dallas is the bartender. Jake is the bouncer. Clarice is the eye-candy waitress. Freddy is the old dude who sits at the corner of the bar, wearing a Panama hat and drinking whiskey we import especially for him. Carol runs the bed and breakfast next to the bar with help from Rosie. Ron is our dance instructor. Marc is our DJ. Justin provides our intel. Malachi will become Brazil's next soccer super star. He will be known simply as Chi (since Brazilians tend to go by one name only). Caitlin will become Brazil's gymnastic superstar. Dallas' mom will be the bar manager. Perry is the cook.
And if the bar thing doesn't work out, we can always get some land in the Amazon and grow a certain cash crop!!
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5 comments:
I'll get my bags packed so I'm ready. I'm not sure Ron would want to be the dance instructor (nor would you want him to be) but I think he'd love to be another old guy in the corner with Fred.
Not so sure about the eye-candy part. I don't think I can compete with Brazilian women. You spelled Kaitlin's name wrong...I'm telling her
Carol: I was referring to a Ron here at work. But your Ron is more than welcome to don a Panama hat and join Freddy at the end of the bar!
Clarice: D'oh! I was worried I spelled it wrong. It was an honest mistake!
Ummm, thanks for the forced invitation. I'll go, if I don't end up with more wives,(commune-sounding-thing-to-me) I get to be the cook and no one makes me sit with Fred in a dark corner while he gets drunk.
Let me know when we leave, since they don't extradite, I wanna take care of some over-due family business.
I would also like to take care of some 'business' too before we go. Also, in the day time, when the bar is closed, Clarice and I are going to make our own swim suites!!!
Also I think we should take crazy buzz and anticipatedly scary pitbull diesel as our chained outside the joint dogs that chew on old boots!
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